I can reveal the secret to Chelsea’s success. Calories.

Visiting chairmen, directors, club officials, managers and players are, in the spirit of sportsmanship and hospitality, offered a pre-match meal at Stamford Bridge.

In the good old days this consisted of a few tired sandwiches and a pork pie, cut in four.

Today the Chelsea chef prepares a banquet. Last week’s visit by Fulham in the 3rd round of the Carling Cup was typical.

First up was Russian salad (in honour of the Blues owner) with quails’ eggs, mixed leaf salad with garlic croutons, and mushrooms a la grecque (possibly a topical reference to European financial problems).

This was followed by poached Scottish salmon and sole roulade served with dill crème fraîche, then a trio of melon, Parma ham and figs.

The main course was fish pie featuring smoked haddock and prawns in a cream sauce.

After doughnuts served with hundreds and thousands, chocolate cases full of Baileys, and rum and raisin baked cheesecake, the Fulham high and mighty enjoyed a selection of continental cheeses served with ‘sun-blazed tomatoes’, a feta and rocket salad and olive bread.

Is it any wonder Mousa Dembélé’s shootout penalty was saved? He was probably preoccupied with the thought of seconds.

That the Blues scraped through to a 4th-round encounter with Everton at Goodison Park was a relief to Martin Jol.

The Fulham manager has been doing well in his recent weight-loss campaign, and will not have to resist Stamford Bridge’s temptations again this season, unless the teams are drawn together in the FA Cup.

Meanwhile the Blues march on. Saturday’s 4-1 victory against Swansea (as Manchester United drew) was only tempered by the fact that Fernando Torres, seemingly back to his scoring ways, was red-carded for a lunging two-foot tackle and now misses three league games.

The first is Sunday lunchtime’s trip to Bolton, where chicken pie is the gourmet offering.